Jana Land

Wednesday, May 07, 2008


I just got back from our annual business trip to Orlando. While we do have to go to meetings and seminars, it is still a lot of fun. We flew out Thursday at 6:00 am and we were in Orlando at 9:20 am. Our group was split up this year with multiple flights and as always, multiple hotels. Some of us got checked in and were at the bar drinking by 11:00. While it is a great time and I love drinking during the day, it makes for a very long day. After a few $6.50 Bud Lights we decided to head to another hotel that had a hospitality room set up for us. That's right all the free beer and food a person could ask for. Of course, with my short attention span, I got bored rather quickly and moved onto the main hotel where everything was going down. The hotel has it planned out perfectly though. They close the hospitality room at 5:00 and there is no more free beer until the next event at 7:30. So once they get us all drinking, they know we are going to pay ridiculous amounts of money for alcohol. Of course, I continued to drink until we got more free beer. By this time, my feet were killing me and I would have cut off my arm to just sit down. They did things differently this year. On the first night we usually have a dinner with 8,000 co-workers. Following the dinner was a concert. This year we had a huge outdoor party with different sections. MTV was even there hosting. It was a great idea and a lot of fun. I wish I would have gotten the memo on it being casual dress because I felt like a huge douche dressed up with my painful shoes. Anyway, that's neither here nor there. By 8:30 I was ready to go back to the hotel because my feet felt like they were bleeding.

The next day I had to go to my half day seminars and had a half day to do whatever I wanted to. After the seminars, I ate lunch with my friend, Dylan. He was trying to talk me into going to the pool. Not that I was eager to get in a swimsuit in front of what seemed like a million people, but I honestly couldn't find one the night before in my massive amount of shit piled in the spare room. I told him that I was going to go back to my room and take a 20 minute nap. Well, 20 minutes turned into two hours and it was awesome! I turned my phone off and just relaxed, something I don't get to do very often. I woke up to a bunch of voicemails, but I was ready to head out for the evening. Friday evening is always spent at Universal Studios. They close down part of the park just for us. There is no waiting in lines and anything you want to eat or drink is free. It's a really good time, but I don't think it lasts long enough. Our bus had a horrible smell of pee and of course it took us longer to get there than most people. I am a chicken when it comes to riding big scary rides so I was immediately discouraged when everyone went straight for the Drop Tower. That's when I became the official purse lady. The next ride they chose was The Hulk. I again was the purse lady. So as I am standing there waiting on everyone some girl comes up to me and asks me for a cigarette. Of course, I gave her one and we introduced ourselves. After a little bit of small talk I asked her where she was from and she said St. Louis. She said, "I'm part of the Taylor family." For those of you who don't know, Jack Taylor is the founder of our company. He started the business 51 years ago in the basement of a dealership with 6 cars. Now he has over 1 million cars on rent!!! Anyway, I thought it was pretty cool that she bummed a cigarette off of me. I was telling everyone about it, but they convinced me that she was probably lieing to me.

The next evening was our closing ceremony. The Marriott actually built an extra are on just for us because they didn't have a room that could accommodate us in the past. The conference room alone was the size of two football fields! It was pretty amazing to be sitting in the front and look back at all the people. Our group won an Exceptional Achievement Award this year so we were pretty pumped about that. Only 23 of 170+ groups and regions won this award this year. At the end Andy Taylor introduced us to his family and showed their pictures on the big screen. It was confirmed that the girl that bummed a cigarette from me was from the Taylor family. Her name is Allie and it was her birthday! So we sat through that and went to the "Club Hop." Basically they turned a bunch of conference rooms into bars with different themes. It was actually pretty cool. It seemed like a lot of people either went to bed early or went to another bar. After I was the last one standing, I headed back towards the bus. I ran into Dylan and Vince who were at my hotel as well. We met a girl from Texas on the bus. By this time is was after 1:00 and I had to get up at 4:00 in order to catch my flight home. Someone mentioned it would be a good idea to get beer and just stay up so that's exactly what we did until about 2:45. I snuck off to my room because I knew I couldn't make it anymore. My roommate told me that going to sleep would be the worst thing in the world and she was right. An hour later, which felt like a minute, the alarm started buzzing in my ear. After an hour of hitting the snooze button, I realized that I needed to be on the bus on my way to the airport and I hadn't even showered yet. I jumped up, got a shower and was ready in 20 minutes. I was almost the last one to the airport. Actually the last one to the airport on my flight didn't make it on the flight because he missed it. I almost did, but I slid in there just in time. Anyway, riding on a plane with an hour sleep and a slight hangover is the worst thing ever. I ended up getting sick because of my lack of sleep and I am still paying for it today.

So in a nutshell, a boring nutshell, there's Orlando.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

I Guess I Won't Be Going There

I have been thinking about getting LASIK eye surgery for awhile. I have never been very serious about it. There is one doctor I have heard about that does an awesome job. I actually went to his office last summer to ask about the consultation, but I didn't have the time and I can't wear my contacts for two weeks prior to the consultation. I didn't go back and I sure am glad I didn't. Read the article below about the "awesome" doctor I was going to trust my sight with.

Eye doctor pleads guilty to fake prescriptions
A Charleston eye doctor has pleaded guilty to writing fake prescriptions.
Dr. R. David Allara, 52, admitted in federal court Monday to writing the prescriptions to several women in exchange for information about a woman he was dating.
He pleaded guilty via information to one count of aiding and abetting another person in getting hydrocodone by fraud or deception.
An information, which cannot be filed without a defendant's permission, generally indicates that a defendant is cooperating with prosecutors.
Allara surrendered his medical license in August and attended a substance abuse treatment program in Williamsburg, Va. Last month, the state Board of Medicine, which had suspended his license, restored his ability to practice medicine and placed him on three years probation.
The former captain of the West Virginia University basketball team told Chief U.S. District Judge Joseph R. Goodwin that he was once addicted to cocaine, and that he hasn't used cocaine for 11 months or consumed alcohol in nine months.
Allara said he knew that the prescriptions he wrote to Danielle Lewis, Charity Grisanti, Julie Shoup, Cindy Merrill and Michelle Merrill between August 2005 and April 2006 served no medical purpose. He helped the women obtain the drugs so that Lewis, who was friends with Brandace Kinder, whom he was dating at the time, would provide him with information about the woman.
Assistant U.S. Attorney Monica Schwartz said that the amount of drugs he prescribed was not typical for his practice as an eye surgeon.
In December, a former patient sued Allara in Kanawha Circuit Court, alleging he performed LASIK eye surgery on her without recognizing that she had a relatively rare condition that made the surgery too risky.
In addition, the suit alleges Allara treated the patient while high.
"Upon information and belief, Dr. Allara examined and/or treated Sherry Dew while he was impaired and under the influence of cocaine and/or other illicit drugs," the suit reads.
According to the Board of Medicine's Web site, Allara has faced five malpractice allegations. The first was dismissed in 1994, and the following four settled for $40,000, $30,000, $75,000 and $900,000.
The last settlement, for surgery performed in 2003, was finalized in December 2007, according to the site.
Goodwin released Allara on a $10,000 personal recognizance bond. Allara faces up to four years in prison and fines of up to $250,000 when he is sentenced on July 17.

Monday, April 28, 2008

What To Do?

So I got my economic stimulus rebate put into my account on Friday. I didn't know it was coming that soon or that I had it in my account until a few minutes ago. I guess I got mine early because I used direct deposit for my regular taxes and the last two digits of my SSN are 11 (apparently that's how they determine who gets them first). Since money burns a hole in my pocket I am dieing to spend it. I think that I should purchase Rock Band for the PS3 that we never play. We almost bought it on Saturday, but we decided to get the cornhole boards out. Well, the bags are locked up in the camper so we never did either one. I knew we should've bought Rock Band. PC thinks I should pay my Lerner credit card off. It's the only credit card I have left and the balance is only about $500.

My dilemma is that I want to do something fun with this extra money. I don't want to pay bills, that's not fun. Besides, I have already paid all of my bills until June. Sure, I can pay off my credit card with my next paycheck, but I hate to do that. I like to pay it off slowly rather than give them a bunch of money up front.

As soon as I told PC about it, he asked immediately if I was going to pay off my Lerner bill. I don't know why he even cares. It's not like he has to pay for it and it's not like it's a huge balance. I wish all of my past credit cards had a balance like that. If so, I wouldn't be paying $500/month to the debt agency for what seems like eternity. PC actually comments on a regular basis that, "I need to get my money right and then we'll talk about it". Well, as far as I am concerned my money is right. I don't use credit cards nor do I have them anymore. I use my debit card for everything. I don't ask him for money. I always pay half of the bills, groceries and other stuff. We take turns when we go out so he doesn't always pay for everything. I guess my money will never be right until I have an insane amount of money in my checking account, just like he does. Until then I will probably have to hear, "you need to get your money right and then we'll talk about it."

So I guess there will be no harm in going and buying something for $150. I am going to hear it no matter how much money I have or what I spend it on, so I might as well get something fun and rock it out!

FYI...I will probably be buying it today if I get a chance to get out of the office!

Friday, April 25, 2008

Why I Love Pork Chop (Part 1)...

Pork Chop, Amber and I have this things for gnomes. We actually call them gnomies. It all started when we were Christmas shopping one day. Amber and I were still a little drunk from the night before. We saw a shirt at Steve and Barry's that had three gnomes on it and it said, "Chillin' with my gnomies!" Ever since then we have been obsessed with them. Pork Chop came home Tuesday night with this gnome and a card. Inside that card he wrote some sweet stuff about loving me and appreciating me. At the bottom of the card it said, "you should nomie better than that." It was even cuter that he spelled it wrong.
By the way Amber, have you found your UK gnomie yet???

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Something Funny...

Every morning I listen to the Coach Kidd and Libby Jo show on my way to work. This morning they played a clip that keeps cracking me up...

The clip was about people being able to vote early. They had interviewed one of our fine WV citizens and he said something along the lines of this, "I think it is a good thing for people to be able to get out and vote early. It's is especially good for those people who can't stand in lines for a long time, like those in a wheelchair."

If you aren't laughing your ass off by now, think about it. It's still cracking me up...

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Yes, I am Still Alive!!!

Well, it has been 6 months since my last post. I was looking at a few previous posts today and realized that I need to start blogging again. I miss being part of the blog world. I miss sharing my funny stories with everyone. I miss taking out my frustration with stupid people. I miss posting pictures of my friends and family.

After running through some old posts, I realized that I really miss Peanut the most! Although I have Emmy Lou, she can never replace Peanut. I know she was crazy and she was a little mean sometimes, but her and I had this special bond that will never be replaced. She was just a mutt, but she was my mutt. Maybe I am the reason she was so crazy. Maybe it was the people who abused her before I brought her home. Maybe it was in her genes. Who knows? The only thing I know is that everything happens for a reason and something bad was probably going to happen.

For those of you who do not know what happened to Peanut, I will share the story. She had a bad food aggression problem with other dogs. She had attacked my dad's dog a couple of times. The last time was right before we went out of town for my sister's wedding. She got him so bad that we had to take him to the vet and they kept him all weekend. When we got home, he had tubes coming out of his neck. My dad told me that I needed to take her to the shelter before anything else happened. About 7 months before that he had told me that I needed to get rid of her so I tried to find someone (See "Peanut Wins"). Nobody wanted to take her then so she was allowed to stay. I didn't try the second time and took her to the shelter. At the time I was living with my parents that's why she had to go. A couple of days after I took her there and after many calls to make sure she was still alive I decided that I was going to go back and get her and move out. When I called back to check on her, they told me she was put to sleep. I finally got the courage to tell my mom without the fear of crying and my mom said that Peanut had been adopted. She has a friend that volunteers at the shelter that apparently told her this (I still think she was lying to me). Either way this was really messing with my emotions. I called the shelter and told them I needed the truth. She put me on hold and came back on to break the news to me...She had been put to sleep on the third day that she was there!

Anyway, that's what happened to Peanut. I miss her so much and I still get choked up thinking about her. It was so bad that I couldn't even drink without crying because I would think about her too much. It was so bad that every time I saw someone at the campground with a dog I felt guilty for never taking Peanut. It got so bad that I finally got another dog, which brings me to introduce Emmy Lou! She is an 8 month old pug and she is also crazy! She's a sweet dog when she's tired, but usually she is wired and she loves to bite me!

She's all geared up because she has to wear a diaper right now. She went into heat the night that I made an appointment to get her fixed so we have to wait another month to get her fixed. The harness is Pork Chop's attempt to pin the diaper up, but now I use it to pull her out of the trash can! Pork Chop also bought her a $90 bark collar, which does not phase her one bit. My dad said she looks like she's getting ready to go mountain climbing with all of her gear on.

In other news, Pork Chop and I are still going strong. I have never been happier in my life. We live together and are looking to buy a house. I am against it until we are at least engaged, but I don't want to live in Elkview anymore so I will probably budge very easily if we find something we like.

Camping season is coming soon! I'm so excited I can hardly stand it! I'm not sure when the first trip will be, but we have plans to go to Piney Creek, NC for 6 days over Memorial Day weekend. I'm not sure how much entertainment is in that town because the median age is like 75. At least we will have each other and the dog to entertain us for a little bit.

So there it is, an update for Jana Land. I promise to post more in the future and to keep everyone updated. So many things have happened in the past year and a half that I wish I could have blogged about all of them, but I slacked off (blame it on Pork Chop)! Looking back now I wish I would have blogged about so many things, but I haven't and from this day forward I will be posting on a regular basis.

It's great to be back!

Friday, October 26, 2007


Well, it's been 5 months since I've update so I figured it was time. Everything has been going good for me. I am still living in Pinch and working in Ripley. The drive sucks, but hopefully I can get out of there soon. Pork Chop and I have been together over a year now! I can't believe how fast time flies. My sister and Erik finally got married (after like 800 years) in July! I no longer have Peanut. She attacked my dad's dog before we went out of town for the wedding. He was at the vet for a few days and this time she almost killed him. My dad made me take her to the shelter when we got back. I was going to go back and get her, but they had already put her down after 3 days. I would say that may be one of the hardest things I have ever gone through. Just ask anyone, I was a total mess! Well, I finally got a new dog, Emmy Lou. She is 8 weeks old now and she is so adorable, but crazy! I haven't had a good night's sleep since I got her and she loves to bite! I would post some pics, but I am having problems with the computer. Maybe I can get some on here when I go to Pork Chop's later.

We spent most of the summer camping and going out of town. It was a great summer and I can't wait for next summer. I have only made it to Huntington for one Marshall tailgate because there is always something else I have to do. We are going to one tomorrow as long as everything goes as planned. I almost don't have the motivation since we are 0-7 so far. Maybe this is the game! We can only hope.

I've gotta go for now, but hopefully I can get some pics on here soon (I know I have been saying that for about a year now). If I could put pics on here from my work computer, I promise there would be way too many!